Thank you for having some faith in your old Guru Maharaja even if you think he is mistaken. Yes I am trying to help you.

My only qualification is that I am trying hard to be faithful to my Guru Maharaja, Srila Prabhupada. All I know is that "the lotus feet of the spiritual master are the only way to attain pure devotional service".
 

Here is another quote from Bhagavatam:

"For advancement in anything, especially in spiritual life, one must strictly follow the bona fide instructions of the teacher. Aditi did this. She strictly followed the instructions of her husband and guru. As confirmed in the Vedic injunctions, yasya deve parabhaktir yatha deve tatha gurau [SU 6.23]. One should have complete faith in the guru, who helps the disciple make progress in spiritual life. As soon as the disciple thinks independently, not caring for the instructions of the spiritual master, he is a failure (yasyaprasadan na gatih kuto 'pi). Aditi very strictly followed the instructions of her husband and spiritual master, and thus she was successful."
SB 8.17.2, SB 8.17.3, SB 8.17.2-3

Prabhupada wrote as follows in a letter to Trai dasa whilst in Bombay December 27, 1972:

"So if you are very serious to remain tightly there in Boston center and develop it fully, I am very much pleased upon you for this. That is advancement in Krsna Consciousness, to stick tightly to the desire or orders of the spiritual master; because my Guru Maharaja ordered it, and I am also ordering it: Go on preaching, spread this Krsna Consciousness all over the world.
Letter to: Trai - Bombay December 27, 1972

So even though Srila Prabhupada has departed I try to satisfy him in his vani presence. I regret that I was not able to convey to you sufficent faith in Srila Prabhupada's vani (instructions). But he can certainly be still present for you as your siksa guru if you value his words.

"He reasons ill who says that Vaisnavas die,
When thou art living still in sound!
The Vaisnavas die to live, and living try
To spread the holy name around."

It seems you have perhaps had some other lesser "spontaneous attractions" before. You took initiations 2 times from ISKCON gurus who left the movement. Even you wanted diksa from me. I have not left yet. Now Narayana Maharaja. I am hoping and praying that one day you will have an even greater attraction to turn back again to Srila Prabhupada's lotus feet within ISKCON.

Yes. As Srila Prabhupada saved you please always stay grateful and faithful to him. Please help spread the samkirtan movement as best you can in whatever mode you can. There are millions who need the Holy names and devotional service in any form. Even the spirit of being in a rival movement to ISKCON may purify you gradually. Competition is also good in any business. I will always be hoping that sometime you will once more regain full faith in Srila Prabhupada's movement even despite its apparent shortcomings. Please see the cold shoulders also as Prabhupada's mercy. He wants you to come to your senses again.

Please can you inform me of the source of this "untrained monkey's" quote at that time of Prabhupada's departure.

I am glad you are researching these matters. Of course there are various ways to hear and study from Srila Prabhupada and other acharyas too. An important new one is by going to "Vanipedia" on the internet. You must have heard of Wikipedia? Using that Wiki software many devotees all over the world headed by Vishnu Murti in Radhadesh are working hard to scan and compile all of Srila Prabhupada's instructions on all topics systematically and make them accessible in categories so anyone can approach and digest them easily. It is a fascinating ongoing project for preserving Srila Prabhupada's legacy to the world. It is not that Vishnu Murti is some kind of ISKCON "stooge" - far from it. Simply he wants to present Srila Prabhupada's vani-the knowledge he is giving in a convenient form for all comers. Fortunately nowadays by internet this can be done very cheaply.

Thank you for begging forgiveness. I do feel merciful to you. But as I want you to realise your foolishness I feel it is best you remain unforgiven so perhaps you can start to understand what it means to remain committed and responsible to the spiritual master.

You have done so much nice service in ISKCON so it is deeply upsetting to us all to see you leaving the pure devotee Srila Prabhupada's ISKCON association. HH Narayana Maharaja is certainly a pure devotee of Krishna but he is not the Founder Acharya who has authoritatively established Krishna's treachings worldwide like Srila Prabhupada has ISKCON. I must properly offer my respects to so many pure devotees. HH Narayana Maharaja is my spiritual cousin (taking initiation from Prabhupada's godbrother) and I respect him as such but as he is not teaching and following Prabhupada's teachings how can I accept him in preference to my spiritual master Srila Prabhupada who is his spiritual uncle? I would be happy if as an enlightened cousin he would accept Srila Prabhupada's desire that we work together cooperatively under the GBC. But although a pure devotee he seems to have a chip on his shoulder about that. In comparison to Srila Prabhupada I cannot see that he has achieved so much to give Krishna to others. That is Srila Prabhupada's and our Sampradaya's "gosthyanandi" yardstick to judge advancement.

Narayan Maharaja has mostly given shelter to those who for various reasons are disenchanted with ISKCON. If he can guide you as Prabhupada has taught then I would give all credit to him. But what is the sign of following Prabhupada if he can give diksa to someone like you who has already been initiated? It does not make sense even. It is not possible to have 2 diksas.

I am very suspicious of his intentions after this. There are many other instances when he initiates those in good standing. He does not seem to know very much about standard Vaisnava etiquette. It seems openly offensive to Srila Prabhupada that he does not recognise Prabhupada's disciples as bonafide gurus. Maybe he just wants to wage war on ISKCON because he was offended in the past.
 

When I accept the GBC's authority it is because it was clearly Srila Prabhupada's instruction we conduct his ISKCON movement in this way rather than have one acharya or pure devotee. It is definitely towing the party line - but Prabhupada's party line. Please look up many relevant supporting references for following the GBC in Vanipedia

Thanks for your prayers for my well being. I also wanted you to receive the seed of pure bhakti so I initiated you as a grandson of Srila Prabhupada and his siksa disciple. I regret you have temporarily lost the vision of that good fortune. But I am still praying you will snap out of your spiritual childishness sooner or later.

I think it is your nature to be anti-establishment to institutions in general. I was also like that until I found that Prabhupada's lotus feet was a preaching institution like a desire tree. Then I saw that here was the ultimate shelter which needn't be rebelled against. I am sorry that now all of a sudden you have started to see ISKCON as separate from Srila Prabhupada's lotus feet. Even though I see ISKCON needs improvement I know that Srila Prabhupada wants us to assist him in making the ISKCON institution as perfect as possible to give Krishna to humanity worldwide. It is a gosthyanandi (preacher's) institution therefore it has to confront so many obstacles in the battle. Therefore I want to be part of it. Its rival institutions, traitors and hecklers will naturally be there also. But let us see what they can do to please Krishna by spreading Krishna consciousness.
 

PS - When all's said and done I just feel that you are suffering the result of being careless in your association. You were not chaste and faithful and allowed yourself to become poisoned by hearing criticisms of ISKCON from weak devotees who were not following strictly but tamasic. I have also heard from reliable sources that you had been breaking the regulative principles quite a bit since you were initiated by me. You never told me about this. This has impaired you judgement for the time being.

See BG 14:8 and purport.

Hopefully you can recover from this infection. I am ready to forgive and forget providing you sincerely regret your mistake. Then let us belt it out in kirtana together again letting byegones be byegones.